Discourse on Loneliness
Seeker: Please tell me how to fight with loneliness ?
Maladkar: Have you ever seen your face directly, never, yet you believe it is you – based on some mirror reflection or photographs. What if the mirror reflects tomorrow some new face, will you accept it to be you? Some may not accept as they are deeply conditioned to believe in their own face and some may accept their new face and go with the flow. So who according to you is correct? Think deep, think beyond, your face is just a reflection of your soul. The real you is your soul and not some photographic reflection ! You will have to seek your own company, you will have to go within and you will realize that the best way to beat loneliness is to seek the joy inside you and not outside you. You will have to do what you like the best, go back to creating new things, may be jotting new thoughts, new hobbies like drawing, yoga, staying away from negativity and negative news and negative minded people. Also remember, you can’t fight loneliness, you have to accept that today you are alone but that phase may not last long. There will be a phase when you are not so alone, there will be a phase when the flowers will bloom again. Winters are not forever. Maya Angelou says, “Every storm runs out of rain”. Have patience. Remember that actually the best bloom will happen when you meditate. The lotus flower of your mind will sway when you meditate. You will not need anyone to give you company. You will be blissful in your own inner world. If others come into your life, they are welcome, if they don’t, it matters not now to you. When you are dependent on outer world, but you have lost inner connect, then naturally you will feel alone. Loneliness is a state of mind. You are as lonely as your mind ordains you. If you are into your own inner world, you can never be lonely. As regards outside world, possibilities of aloneness exist, and if you are without any expectations and you are in phase of only giving and not taking, then you can never feel alone. Learn to be a donor and not an owner. If you expect, then aloneness will creep in, but if you are a giver, it makes no difference how others behave with you. You have gone beyond being affected. And that is the beauty of being living in a world but never feeling alone. Just be a giver and see how beautiful, friendly the world becomes. If you expect or are a taker and no one reciprocates you may get feeling of being uncared and alone. The rose asks not be appreciated. It blooms and sways. That’s it. World is to be lived in that manner. Just be a rose and you will never feel lonely. No expectations, no loneliness. After all you are complete world unto yourself. Why seek solace from others? You can complete yourself, why ask others to complete you? Yes, it is a human need to be with others, that is understandable but being content in own inner world should be your endeavor. You will be less disappointed and more joyful and definitely less lonely!